Celibacy is hard

It will be 13 days tonight since I have ejaculated. Although I have not had dirty thoughts overwhelm me, I want to just go home and blow one off to release the anxiety. It helps sometimes. But once I have done it… I feel guilty. The pleasure is short-lived. As with most pleasures. I am trying to be what I call “quasi-celibate” (mostly for spiritual reasons). I am trying to refrain from … self-pleasure (let alone sex) for as long as I can. Or until my wife wants to do it. Whichever is first. The longest I have gone after I first started, was 18 days. That was a struggle. I am trying to beat that. But it is starting to get frustrating because I want something to calm me down temporarily, and I know that stroking the salami works. Thoughts?

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6 thoughts on “Celibacy is hard

  1. Try using ice cubes…or in any event burst the whole idea and take a cold shower. True its hard, but its a thing of the mind.
    Congrats to you for holding on till now. The longest I’ve done is 5 days without blowing the wad.:I’m trying for 21 days though…

    • It’s strange. When I’m really depressed, to the point that it feels like there is no hope, I don’t feel very stimulated. But anxiety or restlessness. .. that’s a different story.

  2. First time reader, so I might have missed the back story. What is the reason for abstaining? Have you talked to your wife about this? Is she trying to abstain too? Masturbation is an important, natural part of your sexual health and is just as important as the physical relationship you have with your wife. Where does this guilt come from? Who is telling you that sex and sexual thoughts are bad?

    • No back story. It’s something I have wanted to try for a while. My wife is not trying to abstain. She was asking if I wanted to do it on Saturday night. I told her I’m trying to hold off. I’m hoping until Valentine’s day.

    • I am just trying to control my mind. I guess the little back story that there is is that I have been diagnosed with moderate anxiety and clinical depression. The medication is working but I want to try meditation, spiritual texts (I am a Hindu) and when I have more time, maybe read a good book.

      • I see. I’m not very knowledgeable on Hinduism and do not know the Hindu stance on sex or celibacy but I would say from one person to another, be kind to yourself. Guilt and shame are fear-based and will not bring you peace. I also know that sex, in any healthy form, can be a beautiful release.

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